True Blood, Episode 5.12: "Save Yourself"

Well, that was a big, bloody ball of fun, wasn't it? Tonight's True Blood finale certainly brought the gore and the action, not to mention a lot of seismic plot developments designed to set up next summer's sixth season. With tonight's installment being the last episode overseen by the show's creator, Alan Ball, I'll at least give him credit with providing a lot of plot material for the first few episodes of Season 6 to thrive on. I almost got the impression that tonight's episode was more about trying to make next year good, at the expense of essentially giving up on this season's arcs. But at least we had a cesspool of blood to make up for it. :-)

The pile of vampire goo began right in the first minute, with Bill swinging by to stake Russell right before he begins his fairie feast. It's a sadly swift resolution to our favorite character on the show… although he, at least, got a "Oh, fuck!" in before his demise. And while it's always nice to see Bloody Vampire Goo on True Blood, the painfully abrupt resolution of all this fairie stuff certainly makes me glad that we spent all this time on something that had very little effect on this season. (Even better is the fact that we didn't get any resolution on the Warlow thread tonight, either: Whether this will be season 6 plot fodder or something that will be forgotten from here on out remains to be seen. I sincerely hope it's not the latter.)

With the fairies out of the way, the finale becomes a very Authority-heavy endeavor, with Sookie, Jason and Tara joining the dozen-or-zo regular cast members that are already underground. But before we get to the Authority carnage, let's drop in on the episode's two cutaway plots. First, let's get the Alcide stuff out of the way, as Daddy T-1000 gave Alcide a dose of his secret stash of V in order to pummel J.D. into a pulp and take reign as Packmaster. For the sake of early-episode tension, we also get a quick scene of Rikki coping from a force-fed dose of V, which ultimately leads Alcide to head down for J.D.'s beatdown. Will anything exciting happen with the werewolves next year, now that Alcide's in charge? I'm more than skeptical… but hey, doesn't it seem like the pack lots have served as little more than cutaway scenes up to this point?

The other cutaway plot tonight was a bizarre one: Andy and Maurella swing by Merlotte's so that Andy can tell Holly about his little fairy-impregnation situation. But, after an epic guzzling of salt, Maurella's light breaks, and before you know it, Maurella's giving birth in front of Andy… while Holly, Arlene and Lafayette watch with their Cajun margaritas in hand. Ultimately, Andy has himself not one, but four little fairy babies! If that weren't enough, Maurella then immediately ditches Andy, with only the instructions that at least half the babies must make it into adulthood. You know, it's a long-held rule of television that when babies are added into the mix, it's a sure sign that a show is long in the tooth. And even though Andy Dufresne's reliable comic relief is here to help us out, I'm not sure what this little development means for the show as we head into next season. If anything, I'm only slightly more excited for this than the pack stuff from the previous paragraph.

But aside from those two plots, it's basically a massacre at the Authority, with Jason Stackhouse leading the charge in completely inconspicuous mission gear. (Throughout the episode, a walnut-sized concussion leads Jason to hallucinate visions of his parents, who fully support him in his quest to kill as many vamps as possible.) There's a lot of red to go around… and heck, even Sam gets in the action, as he flies into the old councilor lady's mouth and shifts back inside of her, causing a bodily explosion… and a blood-drenched Sam. (The scenes leading up to this, with Luna assuming Rev. Steve's form in order to get Emma out of her cell, are amusing… although it is important to know that the real Rev. Steve is still out on the loose, waiting to strike next season… or so, I'd hope.)

But it's The Quest for Bill's Humanity that ends up taking over the episode's plot momentum. All throughout this season, we've been left to wonder exactly what Bill's endgame is with his increasing shift towards Lilith's side. And for a minute there tonight, it seemed that perhaps Bill was attempting to destroy the Authority from the inside, what with him putting silver in the vial of Lilith's blood, waiting for somebody to drink it up… like Salome. But then, as soon as that was resolved, Bill whips out the real vial of Lilith's blood and chugs, chugs, chugs. Suddenly, Bill himself dissolves into a puddle of blood… but then, True Blood whipped out the T-1000 special effects (that's why they brought on Robert Patrick!) and had Bill rise from the blood to become… BILLITH!!! (Duh, duh, duh!!!!!) Cue end credits!

So how will the show proceed with Billith? More specifically, will his super-villianry actually stick? This is True Blood, after all, where pretty much any cliffhanger can (and usually will) be resolved within the first 30 seconds of the next episode. But this is pretty darn major, mind you… and this has the ability to shake up the very foundation of the series as we know it. The question is: Will the show take advantage of this golden opportunity? I'm almost betting on a reset by the end of the Season 6 premiere… but if, say, HBO were to announce that next summer is the final season of True Blood, I could honestly seem them making Billith the true Season 6 Big Bad, to help bring things home. Besides, we've still got a bunch of real-world humans-versus-vampires chaos to resolve, which hasn't really even been touched upon during the tail end of this season. If Billith is the one who can turn this into full-blown war, we could have an epic final season on our hands… but again, this depends solely on whether HBO is ready to part with one of its few drama franchises. Given that HBO's only tentpoles are this, Game of Thrones and Boardwalk Empire - the latter of which resumes in a few weeks - HBO will probably find a way to cling to it for at least two more years, making the series even more tired than it already is.

So, in the end, was Season 5 worth it? As much as I hate to say it, I can't say it was: Based on my recollections, only 2 out of the 12 episodes this season were top-to-bottom entertaining, which is pretty darn low for this series. The entire Authority-heavy first half of this season was misguided and lacking momentum, and while bringing Russell Edgington back into play for the second half was much appreciated, it only spoke to the misguidings of this season when even Russell himself stated how bored he was with the show's political material. In fact, it's almost disheartening to see how the lethargic nature of this season has essentially turned this season into a setup for next year: Sure, there's a lot of juicy stuff to work with… but think of what could've been done if we dumped the first half of season 5 and molded all this cliffhanger plot material into the second half of this season. It just seems like it would've been a more valuable use of our time.

So, we'll see what happens. We're due to start hearing some casting decisions for Season 6 shortly, and I'm curious to see who they'll bring on, in the hopes that they'll cull together some exciting actors. But, I can only hope that next year won't be as much of a near-total waste of my time as this year. And my apologies if I've seemed too harsh on this show this summer, but I've tried to approach it as a longtime fan of the show who loves it when the show indulges in the craziness of its premise and its various characters. But even from the fan base, I doubt you'll hear anyone say, "Yeah, Season 5 was really good!" When a season underwhelms, it hurts, and it doesn't bode much confidence for the future.

But hey, at least the finale was good, right? Right? :-D

Random notes:

• Prior to tonight's episode, HBO provided a very brief tease for Alan Ball's next series, Banshee, which premieres next year on sister station Cinemax. Here's a version of tonight's trailer, although the YouTube clip doesn't have the few seconds of actual pilot footage that the HBO preview did.
• HBO GO has a bonus deleted scene from tonight's episode available, in which our vampire-killing crew are waiting in the elevator.
• For those of you who want to take the gamble, you can see Alexander Skarsgard in feature-film action when Battleship hits Blu-ray this Tuesday!
• "Bloodbag." "Leech." "Breather." "Dead fuck." "Meatsack."
• "Just think how many vampires you can kill in there, champ!"
• "If I wanna be a fool, then I will be a fool. That is my God-given right as an American!"
• "The blonde smells amazing."
• "I can't believe I am midwifing for your pregnant girlfriend… that I just found out about!"
• Merlotte's is going to need some more tight T-shirts after giving them all to those babies tonight.
• "When did Andy Bellefleur get to be so fucking hot?"
• How about a Tara/Pam kiss for the win tonight, eh? It's a fun conclusion to what's been one of the season's most surprisingly endearing relationship.
• The True Blood crew really laid on the fly POV shots tonight… a little too trippy for my tastes, but still kind of cool.
• "I aced my statistics exam!"

True Blood, Episode 5.11: "Sunset"

So you know how I talked last week about how True Blood was effectively getting its characters into place for the final showdown? Well, as much as I hate to say it, this week's episode - the second-to-last of the season - felt like more of the same: It spent much of its time in the service of setting up the show's chessboard as well. In this week's case, the narrative took great pains to get the majority of the expansive cast into one of either two locations: the Secret Underground Authority Lair, or Fairie Moulin Rouge. I had hoped that this week would start delivering significant payoffs that we've been waiting for all season… but if anything,  the only major play this episode pulls off is to set up the Russell-versus-the-fairy-population cliffhanger… which, of course, is just a tease for next week. It puts the finale in a tricky spot: now, more than ever, next week's episode is a last-ditch make-or-break effort to save the season… and right now, I'm a bit of a pessimist about it. But yet, I still believe it can save itself… with a few unconventional choices, that is.

For example, after seeing this week's Authority scenes, I'm secretly hoping that the season finale will take the Authority material to its logical conclusion… by turning it into full-blown farce. Every single thing that happened down in the bunker this week could easily be turned into slapstick… and at this point, the show might be better for it. For example, think of the Weekend at Bernie's-like hilarity that could've resulted out of the Authority deciding how to handle General Cavanaugh's body! Think of all the wacky confusion that's certain to play out next week when everyone realizes that Lilith has chosen each of them to be the new leader! ("She chose you?" But she chose me!") Since Sam and Luna are underground, too, we can have a bunch of slapstick rat chases through the corridors… or heck, let's have them unshift, so we can milk the hilarity of naked shape shifters for all their worth! Or, at the very least, let's just have dozens of "What are you doing down here?" exchanges, like the one that Pam and Sam had near the end of this week's show. Unfortunately, Vampire Blake Edwards is not listed as the director for next week's episode to ensure that this will happen… but will the director of Hudson Hawk suffice? ;-)

The other major chunk of this week's episode took place over at Fairie Moulin Rouge, which hasn't been the most exciting setting of this season. The scenes with the Elder Fairie didn't help in this regard, because it was just so goofy and unrevealing… seriously, Ke$ha and John Cougar Mellencamp jokes? But once Russell and Steve found their way to the portal (thanks to the glamouring of QB-1 Jason Stackhouse), things immediately energized. Now, that's not a surprising assessment by any means… but Denis O'Hare's scenery chewing as he sniffed out the fairie portal (and the subsequent guzzling of the Elder Fairie's blood) is, as always, so tremendous that it's worth the accolades. I can only hope that next week's fairie army will sustain that excitement, and provide a formidable challenge for our Dynamic Deadly Duo of Russell and Steve.

That leaves us with just a handful of characters who aren't involved in either of these plots… which, more than anything, probably speaks to the uselessness of their characters on the show. Terry and Arlene had a perfunctory scene midway through tonight's episode… mainly to remind us that they're still part of the show, even though their plot for the season has wrapped up. Sheriff Andy has been blessed with a late-in-the-season revelation - that he knocked up his fairy friend Maurella, who, after just one week, is very pregnant. Finally, there's the scenes with Alcide and his dad, which still seemed perfunctory in the grand scheme of things… but still, the mere presence of Robert "T-1000" Patrick has piqued my interest, even if there's no direct relation to the plot at hand.

So, will next week deliver? There's a lot at stake: the finale is written by series creator Alan Ball, who's stepping down as the series' show runner after next week's show. I certainly hope that he'll put his all into the script and craft an excellent and satisfying conclusion… both for the season's sake and to properly conclude his time on the show. So, be sure to join us next week, when we'll break down the finale and the season as a whole. See you then!

Random notes:

• "Since when did I become a halfway house for unwieldily baby vamps?"
• Tonight's True Blood cinematographic flourish: the rat-to-human POV shots!
• "I'm sorry for putting your butt up on Facebook."
• Pam Quote of the Night: "Maybe later we can braid each other's hair and talk about boys! Fucking baby vamps!"
• "I'm a bitch, not a snitch! Love it!"
• So, umm… will a Pam/Tara 'ship actually happen? Place your bets!
• This week wasn't as awesome in the vampire-killing department as last week, but there were still some goods: Jason taking out the Authority guards with wooden bullets, Eric's double-stake "Can I change the station?" psych-out, and perhaps awesomest of all: the T-1000 rocking the bow and arrow!
• "Oh, sweet merciful fuck! That was delicious! Heaven, thy name is fairy!"
• Boyz II Men: for or against?
• This review was brought to you by Campbell's Soup: the only microwavable soup that's good enough for Southern werewolves!

True Blood, Episode 5.10: "Gone, Gone, Gone"

This week's episode of True Blood just seemed to fly by: partially because there was only about 46 minutes of actual episode (a scarce amount by series standards), and also because the episode just seemed to, well… stop. If anything, this seemed to be a setup episode for the final two hours, getting our characters into place for all the big stuff that's about to go down.

First, let's talk about tonight's smorgasbord of gore! Thanks to the current vampire anarchy, and the complete destruction of the 5 Tru Blood plants, so many on-screen deaths occurred tonight, I couldn't believe my eyes. First, there was Sookie's attack by Mike the coroner, who apparently had been turned since last we saw him. Sookie's chopstick-assisted staking was awesome beyond words, and a great way to kick off the episode! Then, we got to witness a gold ol' iStaking, as Authority tech-head Molly met her demise by the technology she developed. Then came Spirit Lilith's neck-ripping of Spirit Godric (in a rare, only-on-HBO display of graphic gore and graphic full-frontal female nudity). That was followed by Russell and Steve's romantic massacre of a local fraternity. And last, but not least, was Tara's epic beheading of the new Sheriff, who was offed just as soon as he was introduced. On behalf of True Blood fans, I'd like to say thanks for working to trim down your cast in such spectacularly bloody fashion! It's much appreciated!

And also, given the brevity of tonight's show, it speaks that a full six minutes were devoted to a single scene: Jessica's farewell glamouring of Hoyt. Rarely does the show gun for our emotions, but it was a gamble that paid off spectacularly, as both characters' pain just gushed out: first, Hoyt's desire to move to Alaska without the memories of Jessica and Jason gnawing away at him, and then Jessica's teary-eyed clearing of his mind. After the glamouring, that first shot of the "new" Hoyt was just so wonderful - such a perfect bit of physical acting there. Jason's follow-up pullover of Hoyt later on in the episode was fine, too, but it couldn't hold a candle to the Merlotte's sequence, which was the highlight of tonight's show. (Question: So, will Hoyt be really gone? It would be wonderful to see a 'new' Hoyt connect with Jessica… but I can only hope that's the case. If this is another example of cast housecleaning, at least it was a heck of an exit.)

The Authority stuff was very much in the 'setup' vein tonight, both in getting characters in place (Jessica, Sam and Luna are all underground by episode's end), by firmly establishing the evangelical approach of the Authority in spreading the message of Lilith (70 translations of The Book of Lilith are in progress!), and by having Eric "profess" his "allegiance" to Lilith in the wake of Godric's ghostly demise. But, I do like the angle of Russell becoming frustrated with the Authority's approach, to the extent that he will no longer be restrained by their ways, and will acquire as much fairy blood as necessary in order to walk in the sun. Having Russell as a loose cannon is always a good thing, and that's exactly the kind of energy that these final two episodes need.

Meanwhile, we got some resumption on Sookie and Jason's investigation into their parents' death by Warlow… and thanks to a newly-discovered scroll hidden in the floorboards of Sookie's house (as well as a Magic Fairie Decoder Ring Of Sorts), we learned that Warlow is due the Stackhouses' first fae-bearing female heir… which, it just so happens, is Sookie! Umm… okay… Sookie's in danger once again. Woot woot… so let's just hurry up and wrap this plot line up quickly, alright?

Just to iterate what I said before: I want to believe that tonight's show was simply a way to move things into place in order to make the final two episodes a slam-bang ride. Tonight's episode was fine in that regard: it kept moving at a furious pace, rarely lagged, and had a bevy of enjoyable moments… but it felt less like an episode and more like a chapter in the season… which, as a fan of serialized drama narratives, I'm perfectly fine with. Hopefully, the rest of this season will just rock my socks off… and I hope yours will be similarly rocked.

Random notes:

• Sookie just loves her Vizio HDTV!
• When a vampire disses Blockbuster Video, you know that's not a good sign.
• Lafayette pointing a shotgun at a random yokel, who's holding a gun at Sam, who's holding a gun at another local yokel… come on, HBO, don't deny us the awesome standoff we would've loved to see!
• Andy Quote of the Week, to Lafayette: "I don't say this to many men, but I love you."
• So, umm, Russell and Rev. Steve slow-dancing to "Teenage Dream" amidst a pile of fraternity brothers' bodies? That's True Blood's idea of romance, I tell you what.
• Reverend Steve's denunciation of a "shadow government in an underground complex" was much appreciated. I feel quite safer now.
• "Daddy doesn't like it when you're human!"
• "Can I get a waitress?"

True Blood, Episode 5.09: "Everybody Wants to Rule the World"

Over the course of the past five years, the vast majority of True Blood's episodes have ended in absolutely bonkers cliffhangers... and virtually all of those cliffhangers have been resolved in the first 60 seconds of next week's episode. Now, granted, this approach isn't necessarily limited to True Blood - it's a cornerstone of many serialized shows.  But, rare is the cliffhanger that actually sticks to its guns and alters the course of the series (at least, for the next few episodes). With that in mind, you'll recall how last week's episode ended: with an unfathomably evil Bill Compton proposing that the Authority burns down the world's Tru Blood factories. It's the kind of grand-scale vampire anarchy that could make the show entertaining again... but would the show actually go through with it? I was skeptical, sure, but imagine my shock when the very first shot of this episode showed a Houston Tru Blood factory in flames. YES! THEY FRIGGIN' DID IT!

Most of the fallout from this move takes place in the Fangtasia portion of the episode, where Tara uses her newly-acquired vampire strength to stockpile boxes of Tru Blood. Pam's darn well going to make sure that she and Tara keep serving Tru Blood to its customers, in the hopes of preventing their clientele from drinking humans. And when the fake blood runs out? Well, Pam advises the private, discreet feeding of humans, to delay the chaos from spilling out into the real world, as the Authority wishes. But, Oprah and Gayle - I mean, Pam and Tara - are no match for an unexpected visitor: the supposed new Sheriff, who calls upon the bar's vampires to start feeding in public.  Now, it's a bit abrupt to introduce a new low-level antagonist at the end of the season's fourth-to-last episode... but certainly Pam and Tara will give him quite a fight in the weeks to come.

Meanwhile, Eric continues to be our vampire of reason this season, as he confronts Bill about his diabolical plan. Bill doesn't fold, natch; he still appears to be convinced of Lilith's power following her appearance in the New Orleans feeding party. And so, when Eric reveals his plan to get Salome and Nora's blood in order to escape the Authority complex, it backfires tremendously: at episode's end, with the help of Authority techhead Molly, Eric zonks out Nora... but in comes Bill, who spilled the beans to Salome... and who ushers in a crap-ton of armed soldiers. Whoops! Hopefully, Bill's seeming defection will have one heck of a payoff in the next three episodes; while it's creating some interesting dynamics between Bill and Eric, this is the sort of personality change that can't be sustained for too long.

Speaking of sustaining, this week's episode is notable for the resolution of not one, but TWO subplots for this season. And overall, even though I appreciate the show's effort to clean up its over-crammed plate, the way in which it resolved these plots wasn't really that great.  For example, in last week's episode, it was already obvious that Patrick would be the one to die... which kind of diffused the tension in this week's hostage-situation-slash-faceoff in Merlotte's.  And no doubt that Terry will be even more messed up in the future, now that he's got the weight of Patrick's death on his hands.  But in the end, this was a trifle of a story that didn't really have too much of an impact on the season's master plot.

And as for the resolution of the Masked Obamas plot, it just seemed really, really abrupt... as if the True Blood writing staff realized, "Crap, we've gotta get this wrapped up ASAP!" So, they've invoked the sudden return of former Sheriff Bud Dearborne, who, with his wife Sweetie, has apparently masterminded all these attacks. Now, I don't mind seeing former True Blood characters back in action, but if this was the plan all along, I wish there had been a bit more of a legitimate build-up to it.  But, in any case, the climactic face-off in the hog farm was worth it just for Sam's reveal as one of the pigs, leading to a hilariously awkward naked fight scene between Sam and the bigots. (Speaking of which: I've gotta wonder how the heck Sam and Luna can turn into flies, of all things. Let me guess: next week, Sam becomes a phone book!)

Speaking of shape-shifters, Robert Patrick joined the show this week! Yes, the T-1000 showed up in flashback form this week as Alcide's father, to help liven up the otherwise boring werewolf portions of the episode.  We got to see Patrick welcome young Alcide and young Debbie into their first werewolf pack... and we even got a present-day father-son meeting at the end of the episode, as Alcide informs his daddy that he got booted out of the pack. Hopefully, we'll see more of Robert Patrick the next few weeks; if True Blood wastes him like they did Gary Cole in the fourth-season premiere, I will be furious!

At this point, we've got three hours left, and a fair amount of ground to cover... and yet, this week's episode has hinted that the season is actively working towards its endgame. Hopefully, next week will keep the momentum going... if so, this season might be able to salvage itself just yet.

Random notes:

• "I ain't Gmail for dead bitches!"
• This week in "Yes, that's a real site": HBO has put up a real www.keepamericahuman.com Web page, complete with the videos shown in the episode.
• It's rare that I make it almost all the way through an episode review without addressing Russell, and to be honest, there wasn't much to talk about this week. But I'd sure like to see a cute, yet bizarre family sitcom made up of Russell, Reverend Steve, and li'l werewolf Emma.
• Next week: "Bill launches a public relations campaign about the rise in vampire violence." That's, umm, exciting. Let's hope it plays a lot better than it reads. :-)

True Blood, Episode 5.08: "Somebody That I Used to Know"

This week's True Blood marked the directing debut of Bill Compton himself, Mr. Stephen Moyer... and fortunately for him (and us), he was assigned an episode that, if nothing else, had a variety of amusing and playful moments that helped the hour move quickly.  What worked this week?

1) Luna-Sam. At episode's start, a freaked-out Luna, recovering in the hospital, uncontrollably shifts into a Sam lookalike... and can't shift back.  I rather enjoyed Sam Trammell's performance, if only because Trammell spent pretty much the entire hour in Luna mode, even when the episode could have allowed for Luna to attempt to impersonate Sam.  It's a small touch, but it certainly makes for a more humorous episode.  The episode also wasted very little time in getting Sam and Luna-Sam together, making not only for numerous freakouts from other cast members, but also that weird cuddling-on-the-couch scene near episode's end. (Let's just be thankful that the kiss on the forehead was as far as the scene went; otherwise... well, this is True Blood, so it wouldn't have surprised me if they decided to head down that path.)
2) Russell and Steve, sitting in a tree...? Our Authority members have returned from their New Orleans bender, decked out in beads and covered in blood. ("For the first time in a decade, I ate a CHILD!") And lingering in the background of this scene is the start of what appears to be some sort of connection between Russell and Reverend Steve.  Has Russell found his new Talbot? Let's hope so.
3) Bill's daddy-daughter time. Later, Salome presents Bill with a young woman as a late-night snack. As Salome eggs him on to suck her dry, we flash back to 1910 Baton Rouge, as Bill visits his grown-but-dying daughter, who begs him to make her immortal before she fades away. Bill declines, saying, "Immortality is a curse!" It's a nerve-wracking flashback, full of saddening performances, and which helps us remember Bill's connection to humanity... which hints at Bill's possible deception as the rest of the episode plays out. Snapping back to the present, Bill proceeds to feast on the human... and, signaling further possible depravity, he also devises the end-of-episode plan for the Authority's next phase: by blowing up the TruBlood factories and forcing mainstreamers to feed on humans.  It's a ballsy plan, sure; and it would be cool if this would actually come into fruition on the show... but I've gotta think that Bill has something up his sleeve.
4) The continuing adventures of Pam and Tara, Maker and Makee! And just like that, Tara's back to bartending... which is fine by me! Now, Tara meeting up with her old high-school classmate had the potential to get tiring quick, as her "buddy" quickly mocks her for being "a member of two minorities". But, Pam saves this plot thread by capturing Tracy and trapping her in the basement of Fangtasia for Tara to feed on. Awwww.... isn't that so cute (by True Blood standards)?
5) Lafayette in "I'm sick of this!" mode. Throughout this season, I've commented how numerous characters have been very vocal about how sickening and tiring their circumstances are.  Well, having just returned from last week's close-call brain extraction, Lafayette is NOT in the mood to handle any wacky goings-on... so when he steps out of the car only to confront Arlene and Holly, who want him to convince Terry that his smoke-and-fire monster visions are horse-hockey, Lafayette shuts them down. ("I'm in the fuck-off-while-I-smoke-a-blunt business, and business is about to pick the fuck up.") But, for a nominal fee, Lafayette decides to proceed with the ruse... only to realize that Terry's threat is very real when the Iraqi lady who made the curse shows up to give a message: that either Terry or Patrick must die. (My money's on Patrick dying... wouldn't you agree?) Lafayette's transition from fake-medium to holy-crap-I'm-not-playing mode is a fun little exercise in performance contrast.

So, what didn't work this episode?

1) Who killed Sookie's parents already? Come on!!!! On Sookie's section of the show, we pick up where we left her last week, as she tries to deplete her powers. Jason talks her out of it.  (Line of the night, after Jason gets accidentally blasted by Sookie: "I'm fine! You got me in the head!" Jason Stackhouse in a nutshell, ladies and gentlemen!) We then segue back into the "Who murdered Sookie's parents?" plot; with the help of Sookie's fairy friends, we're treated to a much more complete vision of the night of Mr. & Mrs. Stackhouse's murder, featuring an appearance by Claudine and the reveal of the murderer's name: "Warlow". But, we're nowhere close to a resolution, which is a shame... we've only got 4 weeks to get this settled - and if Alan Ball and company decide to table this to next season, so help me, I'll... Alright, breathe... breathe... there we go. :-)
2) Still not caring about the werewolves. Well, if you would've enjoyed an Alcide sex scene, full of man-butt, then there you go... but the whole "Who will become the leader of the pack?" plot didn't carry much of a punch, because we know Alcide isn't going to kill Mr. Track Star to take the reigns... speaking of which:
3) Hoyt, Jessica, and wooden bullets. Again, when the bigots reveal that they've kidnapped Jessica in order to let Hoyt "make things right", we know darn well that Hoyt's not going to go through with it. But, oh, no, someone's pointed a gun at Hoyt now? Whatever will happen? Oh, noes!!!!

Five good parts and three bad parts... that's not a bad ratio for a Season 5 True Blood episode, wouldn't you agree? As we enter the final third of the season, hopefully this pace will keep up.

Random notes:

• FREE MUSTACHE RIDES!
• Neat twist on the interrogation-torture scene by having Sam turn into a snake.
• I loved how Sheriff Andy tried to explain Luna-Sam to Jessica: "That's his girlfriend. She turned into him. Now, she's stuck." When crazy stuff is going on in Bon Temps, Andy's line deliveries are priceless.
• Pam Line of the Night: "My mad face and my happy face are the same."
• I enjoyed the little touch of Lafayette wearing Jesus' badge in memoriam.
• Based on tonight's episode title, I thought that we were due to hear the recent Gotye hit. But nope, according to HBO's site, the song used was from the late Elliot Smith.
• Next week: Russell and Steve meet with the werewolf pack! Will the werewolf scenes be interesting for a change? Let's hope so! :-)

True Blood, Episode 5.07: “In the Beginning”

These past few days, I had considered how I wanted to review the second half of this season of True Blood, mainly in order to sustain my writing interest (and your reading interest as well).  My main thought was, “Well, what if I turn this into more of a snarky review/recap piece? After all, that’s what teh Internetz do so well!” But then, a funny thing happened with last night’s episode: it was mostly amusing… and not in the usually embarrassing way that True Blood usually is.  In fact, it seemed, dare I say, self-aware, as we got a number of scenes that seemed to proclaim that the show is capable of doing the type of ludicrously over-the-top entertainment that it’s known to do from time to time.

Now, you may be saying to yourself, “But of course last night was good! It was the first episode in which Russell was able to roam free and wreak all sorts of havoc!”  That is certainly true, especially since the episode blessed us with those delectable scenes of the Authority getting drunk on the precious blood of Lilith.  Leading up to that, though, was the nice sight of Russell decapitating an Authority member who refused to drink of Lilith’s blood… a sign of sorts that the Russell we know and love is back to full strength.  And then – oh, and then! – we were treated to the private party scene, leading to the priceless moment of Russell joining in on a karaoke rendition of “You Light Up My Life”, before commencing with a partygoer massacre.  And then, as our vampires gorge on the guests’ bodies, we’re blessed with the hallucinatory entrance of Lilith herself.  One has to wonder to what extent Lilith’s villainous influence will guide the rest of the season… although it seems so far that the only reason Lilith was added to the cast was to provide some obligatory full-frontal nudity.  (Hey, it’s not TV! It’s HBO! Remember that!)  And then, as if Lilith’s appearance wasn’t enough, Eric receives a mid-gorge visit from fan fave Godric (!!!!!), telling Eric that what they’re doing is wrong.  At that point, Eric snaps out of the Lilith hallucination, just in time for the episode to end.  As you can tell, all this Authority material was fun, fun, fun…I don't want to reiterate what I've said before about Russell making this show a heck of a lot more enjoyable, but the proof is right there in front of us.

But it wasn’t just that, though.  Take, for instance, the hilarious sight of Sam Merlotte crawling around on the ground and sniffing out the Obama-masked vampire killers: "I’m picking up 5 men, maybe 6… bad diets… and HATE… and ENVY!” Oh, and we got to see Jesus’ severed head in a hand chair… because that’s just how the show rolls right now!  (Certainly, this was the most memorable TV use of a hand chair since Arrested Development.) If that weren’t enough, this segued into the quaint moment where Jesus’ grandpa ties up Lafayette, stitches up his LIPS, and attempts to slice Lafayette's BRAIN open so he can feed it to his unborn child and reclaim the family magic.  Ah, but of course!

We also incurred a couple of flashbacks this week. For starters, we got to see Salome as the one who broke Russell out of his cement grave.  But the most significant flashback was an unusual one: the episode stopped for about 5 minutes or so midway through, so we could see Terry and Arlene’s wedding video, which occurred in the 11-month-or-so gap between Seasons 3 & 4.  At the very least, we got to see Jesus back in the flesh, for a rare non-decapitated-head appearance.

What else is worth commenting on?  Well, despite what we’ve seen the past five years on the show, apparently Tara is better served as an exotic dancer than a bartender.  You almost get the impression that the show has depleted its Pam/Tara relationship material if it has to stoop to this level… but oh, well.  It’s True Blood. :-)  Hoyt's finding love with a hate group... boy, this can't end well, but Hoyt's the susceptible type (as the fangbanger look has shown us earlier this year). Oh, and Sookie’s trying to empty her luminescence tank… because if she does, she can finally be NORMAL!!!!! Who wants to bet that this little bit of internal conflict will be resolved within the first 90 seconds of next week’s episode?  I mean, if anything, the show's trying to make people as out-of-the-ordinary as possible. (Case in point: Tara.)  But again, we'll wait for next week's resolution on that. :-)

Random notes:

• Jason Stackhouse on Sookie’s luminescence: “Let’s plug her in and charge her back up!”
• Sookie Stackhouse on Sookie’s luminescence: “Fuck you, I’m depleting!”
• Hoyt, blindly responding to the death of a fellow bigot he didn't know at all: “Motherfuckers!”
• For more Anna Paquin fun, you can now check out the Blu-ray and DVD release of her film Margaret, which Paquin filmed way back in the fall of 2005 (nearly two years before the True Blood pilot was filmed).  Why the long delay?  About six years of editing-room chaos and litigation… but apparently, Paquin’s performance is nothing short of stellar.  And hey, there won’t be any Sookie accent to contend with. ;-)
• Aw, why the heck not... let's listen to Russell belt out some Debby Boone one more time:
  
  
  
• Next week: I hope you like Gotye!

True Blood, Episode 5.06: “Hopeless”

I’m going to keep my comments on this week’s True Blood brief, for two reasons.  First, I’m way overdue on my thoughts for last night’s show (which is the risk I took when I chose to review Breaking Bad and Black Dynamite first).  Second, and more importantly, let’s be honest: there were only 5 truly good minutes in last nights’ 52-minute episode… and those were the scenes with Russell Edgington, played by Denis O’Hare.  Given what O’Hare brought to the table last night, only five minutes of Russell is a tragedy, because he milked every single second of his screen time for all its worth.  I mean, how about that final scene, huh? It was a tremendous display of scenery-chewing, as Russell states his distaste for Roman’s mainstreaming approach: “I wanna gorge on human blood, because I like it! It’s fun! IT MAKES MY DICK HARD!”  When Nora praised Lilith in the episode’s final shot, I can’t help but think that’s how most of the show’s fans reacted to Russell’s staking of Roman: aside from the episode where he staked the kid, Roman didn’t make a very favorable impression as a villain.  I mean, you can’t have any fun when Roman decides to kill the show’s biggest villain through his iPhone! By his own admission, he’s not one to get dirty… but c’mon, this is True Blood, a show that mandates that its characters swing for the rafters.  Besides, we had to have an out so that Russell could emerge victorious.  I’m very thankful that Russell is now essentially powered up and ready for action… because at this point, the show needs all the life it can get.

The clean-up of last week’s asylum plot was… interesting, for a few reasons: Bill and Eric’s Men-in-Black-esque glamouring of Sookie and Alcide was temporarily engaging… until you realize that the scene served as a cheap reset.  Fortunately, I enjoyed the scene at Sookie’s house the morning after, where Sookie’s mind-reading of Alcide quickly undid Bill and Eric’s work.  I also enjoyed how the show managed to still ultimately kill off Doug. I know, the poor guy… but let’s face it, it was inevitable. :-)

Aside from those two main things, the rest of the episode underwhelmed me.  The Tara/Jessica fight at Fangtasia was unfortunately defused before it could even begin. Fangbangin' Hoyt is still just really, really weird... although at least we'll get to see him hang out with the anti-vampire Obamas. Fairie Moulin Rouge is doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING for me, and the “Who murdered Sookie’s parents?” thread hasn’t gained enough momentum to engage my interest thus far.  Given that the show’s creator, Alan Ball, wrote tonight’s episode, I had hoped for a major shift in the direction of the season.  Unfortunately, aside from Russell’s return to power (which is significant, don’t get me wrong), he didn’t do very much… which, for a series with eleventy billion subplots in action right now, hurts quite a bit.

We’re officially halfway through the season at this point, and I can’t help but wonder why I’m still hanging on.  Without a doubt, if True Blood wasn’t airing in the summertime, I’d be hard-pressed to keep tuning in… but let’s hope that Russell makes the second half of the season a grand return to the over-the-top fun that True Blood has been capable of in the past.  And if it doesn’t, then, to quote Mr. Edgington: “You might as well be praying to leprechauns, or unicorns, or the motherfuckin’ Kardashians!”

True Blood, Episode 5.05: "Let’s Boot and Rally"

“Took you long enough,” utters an in-the-flesh Russell Edgington at the tail end of tonight’s episode. And indeed, it took a while: we’re now 5 episodes through a 12-episode season, and tonight’s installment – particularly the final 20 minutes – really gave me the sense that we’re finally heading into the meat of the season, as the point and purpose of various plot threads began to make themselves clear.  We’re on the cusp of payoff… and tonight’s episode was a glorious tease of what’s coming ‘round the bend.

Tonight’s episode had a nice sense of immediacy, because it takes place within the span of a handful of hours. Now, that was primarily to set up the suspense of Bill and Eric’s need to find Russell before dawn… or risk the activation of their iStakes. (Yay for arbitrary ticking clocks!) However, if there was one downside to the narrow timeframe, it was how quickly Sookie came back around to Bill and Eric, after her epic denouncement of her two suitors in the Season 4 finale.  In fact, given the brevity of tonight’s episode (44 minutes, without credits), it may not have hurt to spend a wee bit more screen time for Sookie to acknowledge where they had left things off… especially since Bill and Eric’s return interrupted Sookie and Alcide in the heat of passion.  Sookie did get some clever lines in, acknowledging the vicious cycle she’s in – “A 3,000-year-old vampire wants to suck my blood! Must be Thursday!” and “Onwards into the jaws of death!”

Sookie’s usefulness is quite helpful tonight, as she takes a peek inside the head of Doug, the construction site manager who became an unwitting accomplice to Russell’s revival.  Sookie’s exploration uncovers two key things: a female member of the authority dug Russell out of his concrete grave, after which Doug carried Russell to the Babcock Hospital, a former insane asylum.  And so Sookie, Bill, Eric, Alcide, and a perpetually-frightened Doug head to the asylum, where we quickly see evidence of Russell’s recuperation – a hearty pile of drained bodies with rats crawling all over them.  If that weren’t enough, a room in the asylum uncovers a bunch of still-alive humans, hanging in straitjackets, waiting for Russell to take a drink.   A helpful, albeit freaked-out-of-his-mind, prisoner points the gang toward the room where Russell is… and in the episode’s final scene, we find Russell on a hospital bed, still looking somewhat weak. But it quickly becomes apparent that Russell has more than a few tricks up his sleeve… beginning with the swift capture of Alcide.

It’s weird to see True Blood head into such spooky territory; for a show that’s so focused on gore and sex, I’m not used to its attempts to provide some horror. Granted, it felt a bit awkward – the whole creepy-insane-asylum setting felt made it easy to mistake the Sookie gang for the Scooby Gang.  Still, it was a somewhat interesting change of place… and the brief, brief glimpse of Russell was a delicious tease for what’s to come.  The show’s finished the build-up; now we just need the payoff… and it had better come next week in spades.

The second most significant plot of the night, surprisingly, belong to Terry and Patrick, as we finally found out what the heck their story’s purpose is.  As it turns out, last week’s Iraq massacre flashback had one unintended – albeit clichéd – consequence: One of the Iraqi folks that was shot wasn’t quite dead yet.  Patrick orders Terry to shoot her and finish the job, but before he does, the woman places a curse on the soldiers: she sends upon them an ifrit, which is basically a fire-and-smoke evil spirit.  Now, if it weren’t enough to place a curse on poor Terry, we get a pissed-off version of the Smoke Monster from Lost, too!  And, fortunately enough, we get our first moment of the ifrit in action: Terry and Patrick manage to get Eller, their captor, to let them go… but Patrick knocks Eller unconscious and ties him to a chair in the bunker… where the ifrit seeps in and turns Eller into a Post Toastie.

Probably my favorite scene of the episode, believe it or not, came from the Tara plot! (Cue shocked gasps!)  Recognizing her bartending skills from Merlotte’s, Pam has installed Tara as the bartender at Fangtasia.  And wouldn’t you know it, one of Tara’s first customers is Jessica… which leads to a nicely-written scene where the two ladies compare notes on their transitions into vampire-hood, and even contemplate being vampire girlfriends! (Aww…) It’s a nice sequence that really helps to make the vampire experience seem a bit more tangible and accessible… and it also helped for Jessica to recollect on her vampire experiences and provide sage advice. (I still find it a bit hard to believe that Jessica’s been a vampire since the tail end of Season 1!) However, Tara and Jessica’s mutual appreciation doesn’t last, as they face off in a fierce battle sequence in the bathroom after Jessica finds that Tara is feeding on Hoyt in the stall… and yes, Hoyt is still looking like the world’s weirdest fangbanger.

The other plot threads were short-shrifted tonight… although story-wise, they didn’t have much to offer anyways.  Jason’s He-Man-Footie-Pajamas Dream seemed to be another setup for the inevitable storyline where Jason will investigate The Real Cause of His Parents’ Death.  As for Sam, it was nice to see him with some core cast members for once, as Jason and Andy come over to investigate the scene of last week’s (or, to use series chronology, that night’s) shape-shifter shooting.  It was nice to see Sam’s portion of the show gain some momentum, as both Sam and Nora are shot at the episode’s end by some sort of anti-shifter group wielding shotguns and wearing Obama masks.  (Given the recent chaos that stemmed from Game of Thrones’ use of Bush masks, the HBO executive have got to be scared shitless about how people will interpret tonight’s ending. Yay controversy?)  Oh, and lest we forget, we got a Jesús appearance tonight! Yes, even though it was his severed, mouth-sewn-up head, he still came by to provide some sort of sign to Lafayette (and his mama!) to combat the brujo demon that took over him last week.  Hopefully, this side plot will get some traction really soon… especially since next week is the midpoint of the season.

If nothing else, tonight’s episode gave the season some much-needed momentum… and I have high hopes for next week’s episode – partially because it was written by True Blood creator Alan Ball (creator-penned episodes are always a giveaway as to their significance), and partially because it was aggressively played up by HBO’s promo department after the end of tonight’s show.  It won’t be too hard for next week to deliver the best episode of the season so far – so let’s hope it does just that!

Random notes:

• I wonder how much Arlene’s CGI hand cost in order to cover up Andy’s junk. (The eerily precise hand movement was a dead giveaway.)
• Did I hear that Bill and Eric went to the Kwik-E-Mart? I hope they said hi to Apu for me. ;-)
• The Authority’s janitorial staff must be pretty experienced in blood-stain clean-up.
• We be talkin’ about transubstantiation up in the Authority tonight! YEAHHHHHHH!
• “Are we gonna talk about the fact that I puked on your shoes?” “NOPE.”
• “I have a headache, and I gotta pee something fierce!”
• In the words of Eller, look Ifrit up! F***ing Google it!
• How soon into next week’s episode will Doug bite the big one? I encourage you to place your bets now.  (I’ll guess 12 minutes into the episode… although I won’t exclude a possibility of a cold-opening demise.)
• So, here’s the plan for the next several weeks: the True Blood review won’t go up until Monday night, likely, because I’ll likely be watching Breaking Bad immediately afterwards.  And, since it’s very likely that I’ll be giving write-up priority to Breaking Bad, True Blood might have to suffer as a result.  Perhaps I’ll be really ambitious and get a True Blood review up Sunday night yet (especially if it’s really, really good)… but again, I’ll make no promises.

True Blood, Episode 5.04: "We’ll Meet Again"

It’s kind of refreshing that a good chunk of tonight’s episode revolved around how sick and tired Sookie Stackhouse is of all this show’s craziness.  Maybe, just maybe, I can’t help but think that this is the show’s recognition of how long-in-the-tooth True Blood has gotten… but then again, I seriously doubt they’ll stop the madness anytime soon.. especially when we've got a possessed car, a fairie nightclub, and a nice and juicy True Death scene to indulge in tonight.

As the episode starts, Sookie’s frustration stems from the cover-up of Debbie’s death, and how she can’t bear to have it on her conscience anymore.  Having just told Alcide about it at the end of last week’s episode, Sookie receives some stern words from Lafayette, that she’s “the f***ing Angel of Death.” Nonetheless, Sookie’s guilt forces herself to get her involvement in Debbie’s death out in the open, which is why she turns herself into Jason.  At that time, Sookie also informs him (and Jessica, who’s also present) that Tara has been turned into a vampire, which freaks Jason out.  In fact, pretty much everyone else finds out about Tara’s shiny new vampire status tonight, including Bill and Eric. Having been released by the Authority to hunt down Russell, they head down to Fangtasia, where Pam shows up with Tara – Pam having just rescued her new progeny from the tanning booth in tonight’s cold open.  As much as Tara wants to knock herself off, Pam pulls out the “As your maker, I command you” trick – “a card I’m surprised y’all don’t play more often”, comments Tara. (Again, it's nice to know that the show's willing to get all meta on us.)

Continuing from last week, the maker/makee threads still come into play, on both fronts. On the Tara/Pam side, Pam gives Tara her first human to feed from… and although Tara refuses, Pam again commands Tara to do as she says.  As for Pam and her maker, Eric, they’re initially at odds tonight, as Eric tries to determine if Pam is responsible for revealing that Russell is still alive.  Of course, she’s not… but at that time, Pam argues that Eric should release her as his maker, given their various issues.  Later on, Eric is apt to tell Pam that things aren’t going to end well for him and Bill – either they’ll die trying to capture Russell, and even if they succeed, they’ll be executed by the Authority for treason.  So, Eric releases Pam… primarily to ensure that he is able to leave something resembling a legacy.

On the housekeeping front tonight, the episode was very aggressive in wrapping up the Debbie plot.  First, there was Alcide telling Debbie’s parents that Marcus killed her (and that Alcide’s killing of Marcus was motivated as revenged for her death), which is enough to get them scurrying out of town. Debbie’s dad’s freak-out was a nice touch, but still, you get the idea that this needed to be wrapped up.  Even more along those lines was the following scene of Jessica glamouring Andy into forgetting the Debbie case… to the extent where Andy can’t even remember her name anymore.  Perhaps this was a wee bit too tidy, but it gets the job done.  Heck, the show’s got more than enough story material to tackle as is… why not get one loose thread off the books?

Speaking of Andy, let’s discuss the episode’s wackiest subplot, in which Andy and Jason are invited by the judge for a night out on the town, as a thank-you for absolving the judge’s son’s ticket.  Where they end up is a fairie nightclub (a set that surely must have broken the episode’s budget), where Jason and Andy meet some familiar faces... including Hadley, Jason’s cousin, who ominously warns Jason that Sookie needs to be taken in and hidden from the vampires immediately, or else she’ll suffer the same fate that Sookie and Jason’s parents did.  Problem is, Jason had no idea that vampires killed his folks… and before he can learn more, Andy and Jason are kicked out.  Are we due for an exciting Stackhouse flashback later on this season?  We’ll just have to see…

And to be honest, this season’s been pretty gracious with the flashbacks so far: first, two weeks of Eric and Pam turn-of-the-20^th-century goodness, and now tonight provided us with a Terry/Patrick flashback to Iraq, where we finally get some sort of idea as what their plotline is about.  Turns out the man they’re visiting, Eller, initiated an accidental Iraqi civilian massacre on the Fourth of July (nice timing, HBO!)… which still haunts Terry to this day.  And so, Terry and Patrick head to this man’s ranch in west-river South Dakota, where they find an underground bunker with a freaky, fiery mural, plenty of fire-starting materials… and Eller’s shotgun pointed at their faces. Cliffhanger!!!

Meanwhile, on the Authority front, Nora’s still stuck in the interrogation room, and Nora’s willing to die for her cause. However, Roman forces Nora’s hand by threatening to activate Bill and Eric’s iStakes.  (No iStake app in the App Store as of yet… just so you know.) She ultimately reveals that Alexander, the kid vampire, is the traitor within the Authority’s midst.  As amusing (aibeit unsettling) as it was to see a hundreds-year-old vampire in a little boy’s body, it was a heck of a lot of fun to see Roman deploy the Sacred Vampire Judas Tree Stake on him, creating a nice, splattery mess of blood. (Yes, you can kill a kid on HBO... as long as he’s a vampire!) It’s a nice enough twist on one of our most hallowed villain clichés: the early moment where the big villain demonstrates just how villainous he is – but it’s a moment that the show needed, and not a moment later, in my opinion… and it doesn’t hurt that Christopher Meloni gets to deliver it while drenched in blood.

Finally, let’s circle back to Sookie, who  spends the second half of the episode in a drunken stupor.  Why’s that?  Well, Lafayette went all demon-y on Sookie’s car, levitating it and ultimately cursing it.  It doesn’t pay off well for Sookie later on, when she loses control of her rapid accelerating car.  Fortunately, she leaps out before it crashes into a tree… but the accident pushes Sookie to drink at home like crazy, resulting in Anna Paquin singing along to “The Pina Colada Song” and making out at the end of the episode with Alcide… while Bill and Eric watch.  As it turns out, Eric and Bill are contemplating enlisting Sookie in their pursuit of Russell… whether she wants to or not.  Given how Sookie wants nothing to do with them at this point of time, hopefully this will make for some nice post-Fourth-of-July fireworks next week. 

Random notes:

• Boy, the Authority sure is obsessed with their Apple technology, aren’t they?  They must have a stockpile of Macbooks in the back…
• …just like Fangtasia has an inexhaustible supply of complimentary T-shirts: Just like Sookie before her, Tara sheds her bloody clothes in exchange for a Fangtasia T-shirt.
• I didn't touch on Sam's plot in the main review, but certainly the murder of his old shapeshifter buddies will lead into something bigger.  You know, it would be nice if Sam could be brought into a relevant plotline again... but I digress.
• Some of you True Blood fans may have noticed that Joe Manganiello, who plays Alcide, is in this weekend’s new Steven Soderbergh film, Magic Mike (aka “The Channing Tatum Stripper Movie”). Manganiello plays one of Tatum’s fellow strippers, named… wait for it… Big Dick Richie. (And if you see the movie, you'll find out just why he's named that.)
• Just a heads-up, scheduling-wise: Starting July 15^th, True Blood reviews may not go up late Sunday night, as they have been so far.  The reason for this is because we have two additional shows starting up that night that we’ll be covering: Breaking Bad, which will begin the first half of its fifth and final season, and the brand-new [adult swim] series Black Dynamite, based on the 2009 cult comedy classic.  I’m still not sure what will be posted on Sunday night, but I can assure you that whatever isn’t posted on Sunday night will be posted on Monday night… so bear with us, and bask in the goodness of quality summer television. :-) 
• Next week: “A 3,000-year-old vampire wants to suck my blood! Must be Thursday!” Or, for us, Sunday. ;-)

True Blood, Episode 5.03: "Whatever I Am, You Made Me"

When you think of HBO, “cult TV” is probably one of the last things you think of.  Back in the early days of HBO original programming, before “It’s not TV, it’s HBO” became their mantra, HBO gave us several cult/genre series, led by the anthology series Tales from the Crypt, which lasted seven seasons (plus two theatrical films: Demon Knight and Bordello of Blood).  In addition, HBO gave us three seasons of the Spawn animated series with Keith David, plus short-lived cult comedies as Mr. Show and Tenacious D.  But, triggered by the one-two punch of The Sopranos and Sex and the City, HBO aggressively rebranded itself as the home of prestige television, opting for high-caliber writers and Emmy wins over anything that could remotely be considered “genre television”… a mantra that they still follow to this day. (Case in point: following tonight’s episode, HBO debuted The Newsroom, the new series from Emmy-/Oscar-winning writer Aaron Sorkin. HBO loves its awards ringers!) And so, HBO spent nearly a decade avoiding the genre waters… until True Blood, that is.

True Blood tore onto the HBO stage in September 2008, guided by creator Alan Ball, who had previously gained a lot of clout at the network by masterminding one of their signature prestige series, Six Feet Under.  (Prior to that, Ball had won an Oscar for writing 1999’s Best Picture winner, American Beauty.)  Certainly, you’d think that HBO would have been above making a series about vampires… but Ball’s clout, combined with the network’s ability to allow gratuitous vampire gore and sex, seemed unbeatable.  The timing worked wonders, as True Blood’s first season dovetailed with the release of the first Twilight film, helping to create an insatiable pop culture craving for vampires. As a result, True Blood became a breakout hit, which the network oh-so-desperately needed in the aftermath of The Sopranos’ final season.

Flash-forward to the present-day, where True Blood has entered its fifth season... and fatigue has set in. Season 4 was not well-received at all, thanks to numerous ineffective plot lines (Arlene’s potentially evil baby! Jason Stackhouse, werepanther breeder! Any plotline involving the werewolf pack!) and, in Marnie, a main villain who just couldn’t hold a candle to the grandiose personality that was Season 3’s Russell Edgington.  From a popularity perspective, True Blood has also faded: AMC’s The Walking Dead managed to build onto its already-staggering success in its second season, officially ensuring that zombies have replaced vampires as television’s favorite undead creature. Heck, even True Blood’s status as HBO’s genre jewel has fallen considerably, thanks to the ecstatic critical and audience response to Game of Thrones.  Finally, there was the news that Alan Ball would step down as showrunner of True Blood after Season 5 in order to work on a new series for HBO’s little brother, Cinemax.  Certainly, all was not well in Bon Temps.

So, now that we’re officially 25% into the new season, what do we know?  Well, as any True Blood fan will attest to, each season is a slow build, taking 4 to 6 episodes in order to truly get into a narrative groove.  And even in tonight’s episode, the show’s still moving all of its chess pieces into place… but there’s bits and pieces that indicate that we’ve got some meaty potential for the rest of the year.  But we’ll get to that. :-)

Let’s start where the episode began, with Vampire Tara becoming accustomed to her new vampire super-skills, before stumbling across a stranded motorist who’s changing her tire.  It only takes a few seconds before Tara cracks out her fangs and holds her down to suck her blood… but then, Tara wises up and says “I’m sorry” (her second line of dialogue so far this season), before zooming off.  Tara then makes her way to Merlotte’s, and encounters Sam, who serves her at least a dozen bottles of True Blood.  Tara makes Sam promise that he won’t contact Sookie or Lafayette as to her whereabouts… which leads to an awkward scene the next morning where Sam tries – and fails miserably - to hide his knowledge of Tara from Sookie’s mind powers. (“Boobs boobs boobs…”) Turns out, Tara’s spending the day in the walk-in cooler…  which almost works, until Tara, woken up by Lafayette, emerges from the cooler in front of the entire Merlotte’s staff, all vampired out and positively ticked-off.  She then races off into town, and as the episode ends, Tara enters a tanning bed and decides to toast herself to the True Death.  Pam senses Tara’s screams from within her Fangtasia office, and simply responds, “You stupid bitch,” as we cut to black.

At this point, the best thing that I can say about the Vampire Tara plot is that it’s a sizable – and wonderfully welcome - change of pace from all the other Tara plots we’ve had to endure thus far in the series.  Let’s face it: Weren’t you getting sick of the whole “Tara unwittingly stumbles into the big bad villain’s evil plan” plot that dragged down Seasons 2 & 4? This is why I was so excited at the end of Season 4, when Tara was knocking on death’s door… and which I was a little bit disappointed that Ball and his writing staff decided not to actually kill her off in the Season 5 premiere.  (That’s one of the problems with a show like True Blood: Given the variety of supernatural elements in play, no character ever really dies, which diffuses a lot of dramatic tension. See also Heroes, which took this rule to extremes.)  As long as Tara’s vampire growing pains remain the focus of this season, I think things will work out okay… but again, it’s still too early in the season to say.

As for Tara’s reluctant maker, Pam, she had some nice moments, beginning with the fun scenes of her speed-texting and speed-calculating at Fangtasia, further solidifying her position as the show’s best comic relief.  (Unfortunately, we didn’t get any further scenes of Wal-Mart Sweatsuit Pam, but we can’t win ‘em all.)  In addition, we also got a continuation of last week’s 1905 flashbacks, where Eric stops by Pam’s whorehouse, and makes it very clear that he’s interested in Pam, and not any of her “merchandise”.  After a brief run-in between Eric and Bill (with a special guest appearance by Lorena!), Eric and Pam head to bed, where Pam begs Eric to turn her into a vampire.  Eric is reluctant, mentioning that he doesn’t want to take on the responsibilities of being a maker, but Pam forces Eric’s hand by slitting her wrists and bleeding nearly to death.  Whereas last week’s flashback didn’t serve much purpose, this week’s events make things quite clearer, in an effort to set up parallels between Pam as maker and as make.  It’s another indication toward the long-term payoff of the season-long plot structure… and why it can occasionally be hard to judge pieces of a True Blood episode on their own, without being able to see the larger picture.  (Case in point: the abrupt scene where Terry tells Arlene that he and his war buddy Patrick are taking off immediately for Who Knows Where.)

A loose story thread from last season comes back in full force this episode, with Debbie’s parents coming to town to try and find their missing daughter… whom, as you know, had her head blown off by Sookie in the final minutes of last season’s finale.  There’s a fair amount of dilly-dallying and obscuring the truth… but it pays off near the end when Sookie reveals all to Alcide.  As you can imagine, Alcide doesn’t respond well… but we’ll have to wait until next week to really get into the fallout from that revelation.

Now, onto the sexcapades of the Bon Temps Sheriff’s Department, with Andy’s bare-bottom photo from the season premiere making its way to Facebook… and which Andy, in all of his inexplicable charm, manages to twist into a positive, as he uses it to segue into asking Holly to go steady with him.  The whole “I’m a witch”/”I’m an alcoholic/V addict” back-and-forth was sweetly amusing in its own right… and it certainly helped distract from Jason Stackhouse’s latest dilemma, as he contemplated how he had been taught all his life to fill all his emotional holes with sex.  And when I say “taught”, I mean that he boinked his old teacher, whom he encountered tonight during a critical pickle-purchasing mission at the supermarket… and whom eventually got to see Jason’s pickle, ifyouknowwhatImean. (His teacher, Miss Steeler, was played by Melinda Page Hamilton, who TV fans will recognize as Anna Draper from Mad Men.)  Who knows if Jason’s newfound self-realization will make an impact on the rest of the season… personally, I give it no more than two episodes before he’s back in the swing of things. ;-)

Finally, there’s the continuation of Bill and Eric’s plotline, as they desperately try to convince the Authority to spare their lives in exchange for handing over Russell Edgington, whom we briefly saw at the end of last week’s episode recuperating from his one-year stay in a cement grave.  (In case you’re wondering why we’ve barely seen Russell to this point, it’s because the start of True Blood filming overlapped with the end of filming for Denis O’Hare’s other series, FX’s American Horror Story.)  Ever on the cusp of vampire technology, the Authority outfits Bill and Eric’s chests with cross-shaped devices called iStakes, which serve not only as tracking devices, but also as actual stakes should the two mess up or act against the Authority’s wishes. (I do not see an iStake app in the iTunes store… yet.  Don’t let me down, HBO… or True Blood super-fans!) It also serves as an obligatory moment to get Bill and Eric’s shirts off… but let’s be honest: there are certain quotas that this show needs to meet. ;-)  Later on, both Bill and Eric get one-on-one moments with Salome, who seduces both of them for the purposes of, shall we say, a more intimate form of interrogation than what we saw last week.  Fortunately, both of our guys come up clean… while Nora cracks in the interrogation room, receiving a nice hot dose of silver.

We’ve yet to get any significant time with Christopher Meloni’s big bad, Roman, but so far, he's been spouting a lot about the “mainstreaming” of vampires: trying to counteract the public’s negative perception of vampires, which has been fueled primarily by moments such as Russell’s epic on-air spine-ripping from Season 3. Now, at first, working Russell back into the True Blood proceedings seems like a desperate act by a long-in-the-tooth series… but at least they’re setting things up in the right way by creating opposition to Russell from within the vampire community.  One of the angles I’ve always enjoyed about True Blood is the whole aspect of how vampires have been incorporated into the show’s fictional society, and humans' reaction to it.  It's led to some fun, entertaining, and insightful angles (such as Season 2’s trip to the Fellowship of the Sun).  If the show can milk this aspect for all its worth, while at the same time re-introducing the show’s greatest villain into the mix, we could have a great season… but we’ve got a ways to go before we reach that level. And since we only have nine weeks left, I certainly hope the show gets there soon.

Other notes:

• The rebooting of Rev. Steve Newlin continues to have potential, especially in his new position as “the new Nan Flanagan”.  Certainly we’ll get the opportunity to see more of the public reaction to his about-face, like what we saw last week when Sookie went to the stake shop.
• So, umm, Hoyt at Fangtasia… that was unexpected.  I’m still trying to process that particular image.
• “You guys are too cute to be goo!”
• Enjoy tonight’s brief scenes of Anna Paquin in her Merlotte’s outfit: Paquin was pregnant during the filming of this season, so expect a fair amount of TV trickery later this season to obscure her baby bump (as the show will not write her pregnancy into the story).
• Lafayette only uses the finest bleach in his gumbo. Mmm-mmmmm….
• That was Tina Majorino (Deb from Napoleon Dynamite, and also from Waterworld) as the Authority's version of Q.
• Crunchy or sweet? America needs to know.
• Coming Wednesday: We join the new season of Futurama, already in progress.